I am taking a step back from London.

It’s like that post I wrote back in the summer. I’ve had quite the shift this week, but I can’t find a way to start telling you!?

So here it is: I was meant to be flying out to Dubai next week and now I am not.

I am moving back to my mum’s for a little bit.

Mumma T is awesome. She said to me that she would pick me up with my stuff and we would thrash everything out over the weekend. I love her so much.

She said to me, get it sorted and then blog about it. And while I was actually going to do just that – I love her even more for thinking about it.

 

So here is the situation.

 

I booked to fly out to Dubai back in September, and I was half going to see my friend but also was going to take my CV and see if I could get a job out there too.

However, as time went on, I couldn’t save the money as easily as I was hoping to and to be honest the idea of it slowly became quite tiring mentally, for me.

Now don’t get me wrong, I L O V E to travel and go on adventures! But I became surprisingly less excited as time went on, and then I came to quite the revelation: I am tired of running.

I realised I was trying to run from reality. I was still trying not to commit to something. I mean going on holiday meant I could put off getting a proper job for a while longer; getting a room; committing fully to the lovely people I coach. I have run from committing to a lot of things all my life. However, now I mentally want to stop. And commit to something.

 

So, I told my friend I wasn’t going and I called up the airline.

 

And do you know what? I felt relief. Relief, that I was putting in place a space to create a home. Not that I wasn’t going to travel ever again. But as Gloria Steinem puts it, after years of moving around, it’s so much nicer to come back to a base of sorts. A space you can call your own after those crazy adventures.

***

So this is it. I am staying put, and I am committing. *I’m choking up a little as I type this* Like the resolutions I began at Christmas instead of New Year’s I am beginning my projects that I want to build now and not when I get back. Because I am going nowhere.

For the first time in my life I am planting my two feet on the ground and standing strong. For you and me.

***

I am an entrepreneur and a creative. And this is the year I shine. The year I go for it!

And you will be the first to know.

(Anyone else thinking of the Dream Girls song “I’m not going”?! No? Just me? Ok…)

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What lies down yonder road of life?

 

What kind of space do you want to create for yourself this year?

 

Han x

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