Han Meets Quarter Life Crisis!?

This is partly satirical.

I always scoffed at the idea of a quarter-life crisis. “Really?! Breaking down and feeling lost in your twenties?!  What a concept!” My eighteen year old self would mock.

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*Me at 19 (Paris 2012) – hope you enjoy the massive trendy side bang…

Then graduation hit and the reality hit. The wider world is nothing like uni. You don’t get to see all your friends in the same place – particularly as the majority will move across the country or out of the country entirely. You wonder if any of those people were friends in the first place and, to be honest, the idea of staying in for the night with your cat (I don’t have a cat) suddenly seems much more enticing.

Tax, pensions and national insurance, once something you could laugh off, now hit your salary very hard. And if you’re working from an agency, say goodbye to another cut of your precious dollar. I think of the clothes I might have actually been able to afford, *cry face*.

The career path, more like winding treacherous mountain track of uncertainty. At 16, I worked my butt off in various roles to increase my skills and all through uni. At 24, I have those skills but employers don’t know what to do with me… So I’ve taken to bumbling in and out of various roles in the hope for an in to the ‘right’ department. However writing my CV this week has made for some tough calls and once where my CV looked pretty squeaky clean and steady, it looks as confused as I did ten years ago having to start choosing my career!

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*Back in the day when all I had to do was jump in a pool for a crazy pic to get a job (2015).

An evening. I sometimes question if being ambitious really is a good thing as evenings are no longer a relax with a glass of red occasion. But extended working hours in the hope of fulfilling a couple of childhood dreams. Seriously, if I could go back and tell my school or uni self to start sooner and stop wasting time… Ughhh! Or what if I was just a little less ambitious and all that I needed in life was to go to work and have a couple of glasses of bubbly while sitting on my sun deck in my bean bag – I’m totally jealous eyeballing my neighbours right now…

Ok… Sigh of relief done.

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And how about the positives?

I can move around anywhere I want with no notice. Well, maybe a little work and house notice I mean I still pay rent, bills and have the work Chromebook on my chest of drawers… But the freedom of choice is there. I moved to London because I wanted to pursue creative opportunities and meet my own in-crowd. I could have stayed where my salary was steadier and house prices cheaper. Instead I took a massive leap of faith, which, at 24 is going to be a great choice I am sure. No success story is complete without a little struggle, right?

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*Seems befitting to put a Brazil (2013) pic in here.

Love life. While I miss the hours you could spend with your crush/person you were dating while in education, discovering what adult relationships are about is actually much more interesting and wonderful. Sure I’m sad I don’t have more time sometimes – or money (last time I mention money I swear!!!), facing the world with someone is so much more fun than hiding from it with them. You both have a little more freedom to go places and they don’t still take their dirty washing home for their parents to do…

Self-development. Personal and professional development is becoming increasingly more popular with twenty-somethings as companies begin to favour those open to taking on feedback about themselves and their performance. Being someone who has always been open to the idea, I am beginning to see the long term benefits of having taken on self-development coaching in my early twenties as my past crap is being removed from my life and I can get on with creating exactly the life I want – when I have found out roughly what that is. Many people I speak to on my current programme tell me they wish they had completed it at ‘my age’ and while I am not the youngest in the group, I can tell it’s going to set me up well. It’s uncomfortable but the benefits are MASSIVE!

Anyway! Rambly post from negative start to hopefully a positive finish.

Do you think quarter-life crisis is a thing!?

Han x

*My last day of exams (June 2015).

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#HanMeetsLondon: broke in the city and dating.

London is a fast-paced city. Work moves fast, life moves fast, and dating is – you guessed it – also fast. People tend to fall into two very general categories, the date and ditch or serious and (we would hope) committed. There doesn’t tend to be a comfortable in between when it comes to a love life in the Big Smoke. People are here for a purpose, and love does not tend to be high up on that list of purposes. It’s not negative, it’s just fact. You’re in London now, it’s a whole new planet!

However just because it is different doesn’t mean it has to be difficult. Even on a budget, dating in London is one of the most exciting places to be. Cocktails and fine dining on rooftops are not everyone’s cup of tea after all.

  1. Know your budget. Know your worth. Just because there is someone else sharing your life does not mean you have to break the bank. Sure, London is bloody expensive, but what makes it special is the amount of alternatives. As long as I can sit/cosy up to my date, I am just as happy in Block (Shoreditch street food) as I could be in Sushi Samba (rooftop high-end restaurant in Bishopsgate).
  2. Get creative. I hate first date dinner dates. It’s like interviewing someone. I prefer adventures and experiences. I used Instagram to find out about a small gig/EP launch in a yoga studio in Richmond for one of my dates. It was a hit and miss that could have potentially been a big flop, but it turned out to be precisely what was needed. Again, it depends what you are looking for in a date. But if you are like me and want to build something experience do just that. They build memories that you can begin to share with someone.
    Instagram is my main source but I am also signed up to a couple of other newsletters such as BoxPark (which regularly host free events) and Design My Night. Other good sources are Time Out and Eventbrite (search London and any other search term such as ‘music’).

  3. Know what you want from your dating life. Like I said before, London dating is fast and so it is important to know what you want. And then stick by it! One of the most common things that happen is someone meets someone in a bar, they have a passionate night and then one is left heartbroken because the other doesn’t want anything serious. Remember, both wants are valid! But I highly recommend staying strong to what you want as this will get you the person who you are (hopefully) looking for.
    On the other hand, if you are still unsure, London also makes for the perfect place for you to find out what it is you are looking for. Living in a big and varied city, pretty much anything goes.

So you see, while you may think dating is not possible with a London lifestyle, it most certainly is if it’s what you really want in your life. It requires an honest conversation with yourself about what what you are really looking for, but every person and every relationship is different. So be bold and be brave.

I am happily dating someone right now and if I had listened to convention or given into the ‘no money conversation’ I would be in a very different place – and probably beating myself up that I let money get in the way like that.

You deserve the love life you want, and money does not need to get in the way of that.

My final piece of advice for people living in London and dating is: to have the conversation. Communication is key, but as you will repeatedly hear, people come to London to move forward their life/career goals and it is important that both parties respect that. But also that you don’t loose sight of those too. That was one thing I’d say I was worried about, because I have always been a goals-driven woman. Some honest communication solves that however and life goes on.

What is your favourite thing to do on date night?

Han x

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#HanMeetsLondon: Housing.

Finding a house in London seemed like an easy enough thing to do: go on Spare Room.com or post on Facebook a couple of times and bam! You have a room.

It took me half a year to finally get a place.

August 2016

We were walking home from a seminar one night and a friend very generously offered to let me stay with her for a month while I got adjusted to London, found a job and a house.

One week later I had moved from Southampton to Clapham.

We fit all of my stuff into my mum’s tiny car and then everything but one big and one small suitcase plus my tripod and yoga mat into the attic. It was like my year abroad all over again. I only had the essentials.

The first month was like a holiday. I had a couple of interviews, got settled. Indulged in the fact that I could go to anywhere in London with ease. Well, as ‘ease’ as London gets. It was a new adventure.

I was fortunate enough that my friend allowed me to stay on with her until December – paying a contribution towards bills. She helped me through many tantrums and low points – some of which were mentioned in last week’s post.

It was disheartening spending nearly a week on Spare Room and somehow still not getting anywhere with accommodation. At the time I was still planning on a holiday to Dubai and my budget was tight.

Clapham it turns out was the perfect place for my transition to London. I grew a thick skin, got super into Aussie coffee shops and my love for brunch and nik-nak shopping flourished. It was a blogger’s paradise. It’s like a blend of London and Surrey.

December 2016

I am one of the luckiest buggers when it comes to friends.

Another friend then took me in for two months in their spare room in Shepherd’s Bush. Again, I contributed a small amount to bills, and life continued to twist and turn and be confusing.

The wonderful thing about being in Shepherd’s Bush was of course that I was a five minute walk from the one and only Westfield Shopping Centre! So every time someone came for coffee, we would go there.

I continued to look for rooms and jobs.

January 2017

I finally got work a bit on track again but it was a period when I really wanted to grow up and take responsibility for what I was doing.

I realised I did not have the money for a two week holiday in Dubai and I had no money for a room deposit. I was having all of these thoughts of loans and being on the streets. (Ever the drama queen). It was time to be realistic.

I cancelled the holiday, extended my work contract and moved back to my mum’s.

At first it was like a breathe of fresh air. Knowing I would be coming back somewhere calm and I was surrounded by loved ones. I caught up on sleep and began to take myself seriously. I took on being ‘the inspiration for others to live their best lives’.

Life was moving forward, and it was perfect.

March 2017

Note: when you give your word to someone, stick to it!

Three time’s the charm in my case and it took a lot of clearing up on my part. In the middle of March I finally got back in contact with a friend who mentioned there was a room going in their house in Lambeth for two months. Rent to pay, no deposit. I leapt.

Two months was all I needed.

I felt a sort of relief packing up and moving back out. Sure I was back on my own, but I no longer felt like I was encroaching on someone else’ space and generosity. I was back on my feet.

May 2017

A room became available in the house I am now in and I didn’t need to think twice. The room is mine – once I have confirmed with the landlord – and I can bring my stuff out of the attic at last.

It has taken some perseverance, responsibility and patience. But it has happened!

Over half a year later, I am settled – ready to shuffle around some details – but finally putting down foundations.

The house for me was the crucial bit as everything revolves around your base. Like a plant with roots, I can begin to watch leaves, flowers and maybe branches grow.

Now, I’m not saying everyone’s journey will be half as long as mine. Some people have got places within a week, some within a year. But there are a few key things to remember when deciding to move to London.

  1. Time is everything. You can sit on sites and post post post on social media, but at the end of the day it really does depend on timing of ads and the timing of your response. You’ve got to be ready to leap in seconds.
  2. Contacts are everything. As you can see, there was no formal route for me. All my places came about because of who I knew, not what I knew – and I learned the areas of London that way. And that’s another important factor: speak to someone about the best areas to live in before you look! Cheap is great but not necessarily in Ealing, Crouch End or Bethnal Green. Going out in Shoreditch, Brick Lane and Old Street is fun, but if you work in centrally, it’ll be a messier commute. You get my gist.
  3. Budget! Budget! Budget! It’s true what you have heard, things are that little more pricey in the Big Smoke. Watch the spending and remember the cost of one journey on the tube is the same price as your average takeaway coffee – the amount builds up without you realising.
  4. Oyster Card. I haven’t bothered. I have contactless and the only issue I have so far is if it gets stolen or I loose it while out. While it somehow feels like a London right of passage in owning one, I would hate the feeling of worrying whether I have enough on there to last my journeys.
  5. The London lifestyle is not as glamorous as it looks – although it depends on your budget. It’s routine to see London workers filling out and spilling out the sides of pubs at 5pm most days of the week. To own new clothes and show off at least one designer-something. But it costs to maintain such a lifestyle. You have to be realistic. Transport strikes are very normal and you have to be prepared for long queues and crowds with no warning.
  6. London is a target. I don’t say this as a warning, but rather as a precaution. As a capital city with a lot of exposure internationally, London is a target for activist activity (yeah the wording sounds weird in my head too). I work between Temple and Embankment which is one or two tube stops and a five minute walk away from Westminster. When the initial attacks happened we of course knew we were safe, but roads were affected and we had to have follow up meetings with HR about how safe we felt to be at work. London is a closely watched city with a lot of activity, so there’s a necessity to be aware of that.

These tips aside, I am very happy to be back again and really looking forward to a summer at the parks and enjoying the experiences it will have to offer. There is no buzz quite like the London buzz.

Where would you like to live most in the world?

Han x

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Han Meets London: working in the City.

About a month ago I posted a Twitter poll asking what you lovelies would like to see more of on this blog. And the reality of living in London came out on top. Naturally as a blogger I knew I could make this into a series and, here is the first: working in the Big Smoke.

Originally I was going to stick to the logistics of fun stuff, but as I have mentioned before, this is not the blog for ‘nice’ all the time. This is a space of honesty. And in order to live the ‘nice’ stuff, you have to have a couple of things in place.

The first one is Work.

Let me break it down for you: working in London is not easy.

Or at least getting work is not easy.

However, you should not be discouraged by this.

Grad Schemes:

I had the old argument of ‘do I go for a grad job because it is safe, well-paid and would sort me for a couple of years’. But I know it’s not for me. I have been head-hunted a couple of times for schemes. However the only argument for me in that was that it would   ‘sort me for two years tops’ and ‘I wouldn’t have to worry about money’.

If you want to go into a specific field that a grad scheme can offer, then go for it! If you want to gain skills for a job, then go for a grad scheme!

If you’re thinking it’s the easiest way in. Don’t do it.

I knew I had to change my perspective.

Back to the shop floor:

Fortunately for me, I have built my CV up over the years. So when I presented my CV to certain companies they were impressed by my experience for my age, however they then “didn’t know what to do with me” or they couldn’t find a place for me. Companies would even right me back after I sent in my application explaining that my experience was impressive but I was missing ‘the years’ or particular ‘field knowledge’.

Just before I set off to Paris in October, I sent my CV in to a couple of shops. I got back and had two interviews. Which I got successfully.

After five years of not being behind the till, I hated it. And I gave my immediate notice after a week and a half.

Again, for money and being able to say that I live in London, it wasn’t worth it (for me). Customers were even ruder and I couldn’t be flexible with my hours because I was coaching at that time.

Temp work:

The morning I gave in my notice to the shop, I had a group assessment for a recruitment agency that afternoon.

My friend had recommended I sign up with them. And the day after they had a job lined up for me in luxury fashion. My dream at that time.

That worked well for two weeks. It was a lot of data-inputting but the atmosphere was exhilarating.

And then I was fired. On my birthday. *Insert cry laughing emoji*.

The week after I spent two weeks working for Deliveroo in one meeting room with nine other women doing the SEO tagging their menus. One Monday morning at 9am I found myself in the lift with the Founder. In his trackies. Trust the entrepreneur to look like this, amirite!?

From there I worked as a receptionist in a law firm and then in customer support for an app.

It’s quick, it’s varied, you meet people from all walks of life and you never know what you’ll be doing. You’re dispensable.

Unemployed

While I never actually considered myself unemployed, I was for a couple of weeks at a time. Unless you have a lot of savings, I highly recommend never getting stuck without work in London. It becomes scary. Money goes out of the bank very easily.

I’m feeling super uncomfortable reliving those memories even now.

“London Experience”

A term you might hear a lot to begin with. If you choose not to go for a Grad Scheme and go straight for the ‘big job’.

Like I said before, companies didn’t know what to do with me. ‘London Experience’ was a term I heard a lot. I had a lot of ‘experience’ for 23, but I didn’t have ‘London Experience’.

This is where I had to eat a massive slice of humble pie.

In a big city, image is everything and with that comes relative industry experience, specific to big cities.

Because I have ‘Director’ on my CV, companies gave me feedback. Because I had no work experience in London or specific to, for example fashion, they couldn’t give me the interview.

You will need to be prepare to go crazy with CVs, cover letters and applications. A couple of places I applied for multiple roles and only heard back for one. You just never quite know.

What’s next?

Now I have my foot back in London, it’s strongly on to dusting the CV and giving LinkedIn a facelift.

Temping has been a wonderful way to try different fields and get to know what I am and am not prepared to do in work. For example, I am happy doing admin but don’t like answering phones.

But having a room, that I pay rent for and will be in for a few months now, I want to build a life.

“Build a life, not simply a career” – Lady Boss Blogger

A great job and/or career is great, but you have to want the lifestyle too.

So my next step is to create a career that builds the life I also want.

What is the life you want?

Han x

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Liebster Award

So a couple of weeks ago I was nominated by the lovely blogger and fellow Coconut Queen, Chelsea Hodges for the Liebster Award!

What I like about this tag is that it encourages connection with bloggers that I would not have known about otherwise and across oceans.

It’s a chance for you, dear readers, to get to know me a little better and also for other bloggers to connect.

Thank you Chelsea for nominating me and apologies for the tardiness!! Here goes:

Post 11 Facts About Yourself:

  1. I live in London.
  2. I have lived outside of the UK twice.
  3. I speak four other languages at varying degrees of fluency.
  4. I am a Sagittarius.
  5. I have practiced different types of dance for as long as I can remember. From ballet to samba.
  6. I am left-handed.
  7. I LOVE Mexican food.
  8. I am a wine snob – South American reds for the win!
  9. I always buy a copy of Vogue when I go abroad.
  10. The only other country I have travelled to where English was also the first language, is Scotland. Travelled mostly to Spanish speaking countries…
  11. I have been doing self-development since February 2016.

Answer the 11 Questions Your Nominator Asked:

  1. What made you start blogging? I have always loved writing but I started an actual blog to document my Year Abroad (a compulsory year for a languages degree) in Brazil.
  2. What is your favourite part of blogging? Seeing my ideas come to life and the online creative community.
  3. What’s your favourite food? Enchiladas!!
  4. What is your dream job? Business owner and writer (realistic); actress (pipe dream).
  5. What was your favourite subject at school? English.
  6. What is your biggest fear? What comes with success.
  7. Morning bird or night owl? Morning bird! I cannot sleep past 7am!
  8. What’s your least favourite part of blogging? Bots 🙄
  9. What post are you most proud of? Probably when I wrote about my self-development journey last summer.
  10. Do you have any tips for a beginning blogger? Oh I have many tips, but the most common thing I hear is that people want their first post to be perfect. It won’t be! So my advice is: just start!
  11. What’s your favourite social media to promote your blog on? Twitter for sure. The support on there is a-mazing!


Nominate 11 Other Bloggers

  1. This Last Moment
  2. Bunnies Are Magic
  3. Amy Ameldi
  4. Cook With Amore
  5. Grace Hebditch
  6. Alys George
  7. Smart World Citizen
  8. Charlotte Phillips
  9. The Girl On The Move
  10. John Sennett
  11. Nusha Blog


Ask Them 11 Questions:

  1. What inspired you to begin blogging?
  2. What motivates you to keep blogging?
  3. Who was the first blogger you followed?
  4. What is your blogging message?
  5. What is your favourite app?
  6. Do you plan to blog full time?
  7. What is one blogger cliché that bugs you?
  8. What is one piece of advice you wish you had been given when you started blogging?
  9. If you were an app, which one would you be?
  10. Which camera do you prefer to use for your online work?
  11. Did you have any misconceptions of blogging before you started?


Let Them Know They’ve Been Nominated!

Want to join in? Pick a question and tweet/comment your answer!

Han x

The moment I started doubting myself (Part 2). The takeaway.

So originally I was going to write my own response based on this video. A beautiful video  reminding us to really look at how beautiful we are and take pride in the details of ourselves – or at least that is what I took from it. Next time I tell myself my butt is big, I’ll remind myself that it’s a beautiful curvaceous French butt from my great great grandmother 😉

But then I got some super valuable coaching last weekend that I was just that bit more inspired to share and sort of tied in anyway.

Last week I got where my fear in my capabilities came from. Where I began in my life to tell myself that I couldn’t have success. That success was not something I could have. And so I have always half-finished or never quite fully completed or committed to projects, relationships of all levels, everything.

Now, if you’ve read the letter you’ll notice it said to my seven year old self and might be thinking that a seven year old can’t think all of those complex things at once. And that is true. But it planted a seed. “Something is wrong”, “something is wrong with me”. Small hints that then got chipped away at throughout the last fifteen or so years since.

I got I don’t love myself. And so I was encouraged to throw myself into that letter to uncover just where I had fallen down the rabbit hole of self-sabotage. I wrote it crying, laughing and intrigued. I finished the letter and felt ten times more beautiful. I have begun to love myself again. Sure the gremlin of horror resurfaces every so often, but I get where I am self-sabotaging and so allowing others in. I told a guy he matters to me, I am allowing him to support me and being brave for the both of us.

My to-do list is moving again and switching up each week. I’m reaching levels I never thought I would with my creative work and allowing for it to happen. Considering my steps carefully and thinking fully. It is a beautiful thing to stand and admire one’s work.

As for myself, I am more considerate of what is going on in my head. My inner dialogue.

And that is kind of it. Not much else to say. But wow is it relieving to have found it! Like dislodging a thorn in your side you didn’t even realise was there!

Moving forward I give my word to:

  • Be fully considerate and mindful of each step of my blog makeover. Love and commit fully to each step of the process.
  • This Bank Holiday weekend: be fully present and in the moment with the important people in my life. Step away from the phone for five minutes!

It feels like there should be a third but I can’t think just now…

I hope you have a lovely Easter and get time to switch off and be with the ones you love dearest. You got this!

Are you spending time with family or going on holiday?

Han x

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*Brick Lane mural. 

 

The moment I started doubting myself (Part 1). The context.

Dear Hannah,

In 1999, you were in the playground at school. You had your hair in plaits and wearing the big comfy school fleece. You were playing tag. Then the game changed to girlfriends and boyfriends. The girlfriends were suddenly allowed into the hut. All the boys had grabbed a girl and run into this wooden hut. No one grabbed your hand.

But you ran in anyway because you didn’t want to be left out. You were determined to be part of the fun. But one of the boys said “no Hannah you can’t come, you not one of our girlfriends”. You said “so” but they blocked you from going in. I think you then ran off and found some less popular boys to play with and they accepted you.

In 2017, at 24 years old, I forgive you. I forgive you for deciding we aren’t good enough for the popular boys. I forgive you for deciding we/I am ugly. I forgive you for getting scared and running away to avoid further rejection. I forgive you for deciding that I/we can only be good enough for not so strong boys. I forgive you for making it mean I don’t matter to boys/men. I forgive you for deciding that I’m not perfect enough and my clothes are ugly. I forgive you for deciding I’m the odd one out, the ugly duckling, and there’s something wrong with being different and active and adventurous and independent-minded.

I forgive you for deciding to feel uncomfortable in your own skin. I forgive you for shutting down on who you are. I forgive you for shutting down who I am and buying into who I am is not perfect. I forgive you for accepting that I am not perfect. For thinking I am imperfect.

I forgive you for taking on I am imperfect and all I can and ever will be is imperfect and incomplete. I forgive you for deciding your voice is unimportant.

I choose to be ten times more proud and ten times more excited about what I am up to in life. I am powerful, loving, lovable and creative. AND ADVENTUROUS!

I matter.

We matter. We are important. We contribute. We are free.

I. Am. Free!

I let you and the stories and the decisions go.

Enjoy nothingness. I love you.

Lots and lots of love, 

Present & Future Han (aka Hannah) x

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*The evening after I wrote that letter.

Feminism meets Girl Boss

So I want to start off by admitting that I am both uncertain and slightly nervous about writing this post.

I actually had the post ready to go at the end of my train journey this morning. But it was just too heavy and kept sliding down a defensive path. Which is not what I or this blog is about. (She says defensively). Han Meets World is about exploring different avenues and creating an open and respectful space for others to live a life they love and are empowered by. So I request you create this with me when you read this blog ❤

Feminist: the person who believes in the political,
social and economic equality of the sexes.” 

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie did an interview with Stylist Magazine last week, and this is what gave me the nudge to write this. That, and I asked someone to lucky dip a blog idea for today.

 

To be quite honest with you, I don’t like it when people tell me I “need” feminism. The truth is, on paper I am a feminist and if you ask me I will tell you I am a feminist. Heck I want to buy the Prada t-shirt from SS17.

But I don’t “need” it. I don’t “need” to be told I “need” anything. To me, I am blessed with the wonderful world of choices. And what I choose is empowerment in my life. I choose to have it as a human being and I choose to encourage it in other human beings. Empowerment is the word that rings strongest for me and the choices I make.

What Adichie touches base on in her interview is about encouraging people to have fun with feminism and their beliefs. Her family is divided in their opinions, but what would make her happy is simply to encourage people to open up for at least a conversation about it.

And that is how I have wanted to bring feminism to the table. I don’t know how I have never got hold of Adichie’s literature before!?

Adichie mentions that now she has made a name for herself in this area, she gets invited to loads of feminism-related events, and she’s not pleased about it. It makes it more serious than necessary. Which I breathed a sigh of relief at. It was such a refreshing read to know that a big name like that could have a very open and realistic mindset.

As human beings we all have different priorities, and feminism is in fact a part of a lot of people’s agendas in one shape or another if we allow it to be brought to the table. If we allow different people’s experiences and interpretations to be voiced. And sadly no, they won’t always fit.

What is so fascinating to me however is that in the discussions I do have, no matter how windy criss-cross the path, most people will always end back at equality for all. Not always, but 9 times out of 10. So why do we get caught up on how everyone gets there?!

As an aspiring entrepreneur of 2017 – yep I went there – I choose to create equality where I go, do business with those interested in equality and stand alongside those who believe in equality. I don’t necessarily shout about feminism, but I subconsciously explore the realms of it and like all humans will find the bits that work for me and the direction I want to take with my life and work. In my life, it appears as creating the space for people to flourish in their authentic selves and go for the goals they really want.

Feminism is one of the wonderful expressions in which you can really get to understanding what matters to a person, so why not encourage that conversation? And listen? How do they use it proactively in their lives to make a difference? 

I encourage you, dear reader, to enjoy it!

Han x

A shift in thinking/Han Meets Falesha 

Hey readers! I’ve been pretty quiet here for a little while and I must change that.

You might know that I’ve taken on a leadership course. It’s incredible! But it’s kicking my butt.

The whole of the last weekend my integrity was being questioned and the mad crazy voice in my head that shouts things like “I can’t do it” got louder and cloudier.

I call her Falesha.


*Post-Falesha attack.

At first Falesha was an Internet joke, and then I started using it with someone I coached for the laughter effect.

For me it helps to personify the nastiness – that I would never EVER say to anyone else – in a named form.

Falesha clouds my brain when I want to write and get creative. Nails my feet to the floor when I want to go somewhere and sends me into a panic whenever I go to take action.

Now Falesha sounds more dramatic than she is. But this course is bringing her out. Or you could say, I’m challenging her myself.

See I’ve got to a stage with my blog that I never thought I would and neither I or Falesha have ever had to deal with that – because I typically quit before that.

In order to keep my blog going we have to operate at a higher level. Something I have no experience in but sends Falesha crazy because of it. It’s not ‘safe’.

But I got to it and felt it last Friday. I bawled my eyes out in public and gave into the fear. Then I got up and kept going. 

I got that Falesha does not determine whether I am courageous or brave. Falesha does not determine how my life goes.

I cleared up messes that I had let Falesha tell me I’d wing. I saw for myself where I had let looking good in front of other people affect my day and my schedule.

Even writing this on the train now, I’m making mistakes and getting distracted out the window. She’s a devious little monster, Falesha.

But the beauty is being able to express it and vocalise it. I have a wonderful community I can do that with.

The people on my course, my family, friends, my accountability partner, even people at work.

And this morning for the first time in a very long time. I started getting joyous about indulging in my craft again.

No fear in opening up WordPress, going blank at the idea of a tweet and feeling bad because I have literally no Insta content.

Just a calm and freedom.

Have you ever experienced anything similar?

Han x

Why entrepreneurialism?

So I asked a friend what she would like to see from this blog and I had that kind of ‘duh, why haven’t I thought of that yet’ moment.

She said that from a blog that was all about breaking into entrepreneurialism and being an example of someone living their best life, she would like to see a post on my ‘why’.

  • Why entrepreneurialism for me?
  • What keeps me motivated?

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I choose entrepreneurialism for my love of dabbling. For the flexibility, the thrill of the uncertain – despite how uncomfortable I feel by being uncertain right now. The adventure. The freedom.

It is a hard slog and despite being someone who loves instant gratification and getting places quick, entrepreneurialism is a new challenge that I am taking on. Once you’re there you pat yourself on the back and find the next thing right. Well entrepreneurialism keeps my passion alive for creativity, community and adventure.

I choose financial freedom as an end goal. My stand is to be an inspiration for others living their best lives. And it’s tough. But I choose to be tenacious for my community.

I stay motivated by the people I get to inspire. I stay motivated by remembering that entrepreneurs live a couple of years how most wouldn’t for the decades that others wished they could. *By the way, the way I look at that last statement is that I am pushing for something outside of most people’s comfort zones, not that I want to point fingers…!

I stay motivated by who I am and reminding myself who I authentically am. I am playing a big game, and it’s not easy. But that’s the fun part. It’s not meant to be smooth-sailing all the time.

I stay motivated by that I care that people are lifted up. Are supported. Are loved.

Every minute counts.

I choose entrepreneurialism for the freedom to help and support others. The support I got and I want to share.

I stay motivated by the dreams that could be made and the action that might be created one day.

Working all over the world. Making connections wherever I go. Creating action whenever I choose.

I am an entrepreneur. It is in my soul. That is also why I stay motivated.

What is your ‘why’?

Han x